ALABAMA BARBEE

This little redneck girl just broke down on the outskirts of Hicksville.

Thinking as fast as a hillbilly can, she pushed her pickup off on the side of the old dirt road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the truck and one behind it. Then she got back in the cab to wait.

A passerby studied the scene as he drove by and was so curious he turned around and went back. He asked Alabama Barbee what the problem was. Our cutie replied, "I have a flat tire."

The passerby asked, "But what's with the flowers?" This Southern doll responded, "When you break down they tell you to put flares in the front and flares in the back!"

As cute as a sows tail, this playmate will keep your little boy or girl occupied for hours on end. Rebel flag, hoopty, and six pack included. Flowers extra.

TEXAS BARBEE

Some people say, only two things come out of Texas - steers and queers. Well Texas Barbee just loves spending time with her gay boo, Kenneth. When they ain't eating beef they're talking about it. And if they ain't talking about it they're taking it. And if they ain't doing that then they're shopping. Probably shopping for something pink with high heels.

This fire brand comes with her own herd of cattle, a 4-wheel drive pick-up truck that has a bumper sticker saying 'Cowgirls do it Rodeo Style,' and Kenneth.

With her daddies oil money she bought her very own MacDs and put BBQ MacBeef Nuggets and Steaming Hot Cow Pies on the menu. Its probably the only MacDs in America with sawdust on the dance floor. Real cowboy not included.